i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
