The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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