I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
