That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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