I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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