just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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