Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
When did we convert life to cartoon?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
