youre lurking in front of me
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
