i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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