Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
is that a dick in a sweater?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
