he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
