So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
