Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
