Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
