it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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