it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
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