I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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