I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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