on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize