the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
