Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
