Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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