I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Such a big mess for such a small penis
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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