Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
