I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I just want nice things and good sex
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
