fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
i think i just lost a toe
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
