Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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