thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
