the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
