it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize