I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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