i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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