He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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