Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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