I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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