Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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