Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
