where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize