I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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