He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
