It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize