just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
