Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
