Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
