I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
