omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
