I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
