is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
