i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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