I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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