i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
