too bad you live with your parents still
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Randomize
